Innocence
by TaraAnyaKate
Summary: Chapter Four: Grace goes a little crazy
1. Default Chapter

****

March 2nd, 2005

It was strange how when someone you loved died, you think your life would come to a stand still, but it doesn't. You go on. You take your trash out and help buy groceries for your mother. Going to work is sort of bittersweet, but you still do it. Death of a loved one isn't death of your own life….Well, it wasn't in Brendan's case.

He knew people stared at him every single time he walked into the house. They were judging him because he carried the Finney name. Or maybe they knew what had happened, but they understood why he and Davis did it. There was one person he knew understood and didn't judge him.

"Finn, you have a visitor." Ty said as he walked into the locker room, "And she's looking mighty hot." Brendan closed his locker.

"Shut up." He zipped his jacket up. He didn't need anyone checking out his woman. His woman…Lord, she wasn't his. She was barely his girlfriend. She was his…Grace. He stepped out of the locker room and saw grace standing by the desk. Her brown hair was wind tossed. Her cheeks were rosy. It was a blustery day outside. She glanced over at him and began to smile.

"You ready to go?" She asked rubbing her hands together. Brendan nodded.

"No gloves?" He asked.

"Gloves are for wimps." She winked. Brendan chuckled as he took her hand. God, they were cold. He glanced at her face to see if she would flinch beneath his touch, but no. She had accepted his hand round her. "We're getting food right?"

"Sure." Brendan nodded. He was kind of hungry. He had to admit it. Grace looked at him and bit her lip. She sighed.

"You had a hard day didn't you?" She asked. Brendan shrugged his shoulders.

"No more than usual, I suppose." He told her. Grace shook her head.

"You have that look on your face." She said; Brendan smirked.

"What look is that?" He asked her. Grace thought to choose her words slowly.

"You look like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders, Brendan." She said, "I don't like when you look like that. Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Just have dinner with me and I'll be fine." he told her. Grace nodded.

"I can do that." She said.

Brendan sat there poking at his carrots as he watched Grace. She was talking about work and a patient she and Holly had. She really was gorgeous. Grace tucked her hair behind her ear as she looked at him.

"Well, I guess I will stop my story since I can see you are not listening." She said to him. Brendan smiled at her.

"I'm sorry. I was just-"

"Staring? I see." Grace said with a chuckle, "What's so interesting on my face?"

"Your nose. Your lips. Shall I go on?" Brendan asked. Grace groaned and rolled her eyes.

"Please no." She said, "You'll make me throw up." Technically she wouldn't throw up. She liked hearing his compliments. It made her feel good. It had been a long time since she had felt this good.

"Okay. I won't say anything more then." Brendan said. He liked telling her things though. Grace wiped some sauce off of her lips and put her napkin down.

"How's your food?" She asked. "Or should I ask, how was it?" Brendan ate his last carrot and looked at Grace.

"It was delicious." He said pulling out his wallet. Grace pushed back her seat and stood up. This was the moment of the evening that always made her nervous…Although she wouldn't let anyone know it. Brendan would put his hand on the small of her back and led her outside. Then there was that question. Would he walk her home or just go home himself. "Ready?"

"Got my jacket on so I would say yeah." She said walking out. There it was…His hand was on the small of her back. Grace's heart quickened. Why did he do that to her?

"Do you have work tomorrow?" Brendan asked her. Grace shook her head.

"Thankfully no. I need a day off." She said, "What about you?"

"I have a day off too." He said. Grace's lips curled into a smile. "Come on. It's cold out here." Brendan began to lead her down the street. Okay, so he was walking her home. It was one of those days. They were silent for awhile as they walked down the street. Brendan looked at Grace and smiled. "I like you."

"I like you too." Grace smiled. They were silent once again. Why was this so hard? He made her giddy. Why couldn't she just chat with him and tell him she wanted to sleep with him and wanted more? She was being ridiculous. She couldn't open that can of worms.

"Do you want to do something tomorrow?" Brendan asked her. She shrugged her shoulders.

"Like what?" Grace asked. Brendan knew she would ask that.

"Well, it's too cold to go to the beach and Coney Island isn't open yet." He said, "How does a movie night with warm popcorn sound?"

"It sounds perfect." She said stopping in front of her apartment building. She pulled out her keys. "Thank you for dinner. It was good."

"It was nice to have good company while eating." Brendan said looking at her apartment building. "May I come in?" There was that question. As much as she wanted him tonight, she couldn't let it happen.

"I don't think that would be a good idea." Grace told him. He sighed deeply.

"Why?" Brendan asked.

"I'm not ready for that yet." Grace bit her lip for a moment. Brendan sighed, but nodded.

"We don't have to do anything Grace." He said. Grace couldn't help but to chuckle.

"If I'm alone with you in my apartment, things will happen." Grace told him.

"What kind of things?" Brendan smirked. Grace smacked his shoulder.

"You know what kind of things, Pervert." She said to him. She took a step up. "Good night, Brendan." He smiled.

"Good night, Grace." He leaned up and gave her cheek a kiss. "I'll give you a call tomorrow and we'll set something up."

"I'll pencil you in." She winked playfully going to her door. "Bye."

"Bye." Brendan stood there and watched her walk in. He had to make sure she got in safely. He knew she would probably hate that but he didn't care. As much as she tried to push him away, Brendan wouldn't go away. He would be here and when she would be ready, he'd open his arms for her.


	2. The Kiss

****

March 16th, 2005

What the hell were all these feelings coursing through her veins? They were things she had never felt before and no she wouldn't admit it. She couldn't admit it. She knew what love did. Ack! There was that word. Love….

"Hurry up. Holly." Grace growled taping the window with her finger. Holly looked at her with a frown.

"I'm almost to the house." She said, "I would take in a deep breath and remember whatever you need to do after your shift will still be there."

"I don't want to keep Brendan waiting." Grace said. A smile returned to Holly's face. She seemed to talk a lot about Brendan. Holly didn't mind it really because she talked about Carlos a lot. It was just nice to see Grace talking about something so passionately. Grace didn't know she was though.

"Where are you meeting him?" Holly asked.  
"Just Hagerty's. Drink after a long day at work." Grace shrugged. Holly nodded as she pulled into the house. Grace almost immediately jumped out. She wasn't one for make-up and push up bras, but when she was going to see Brendan she wanted to look good. Grace dashed up the stairs to the bunks. Just a little eye crap and lip crap. She would be good then.

"She has a date." Holly explained to the firemen that were staring at the stairs.

"She's crossing over." DK said.

"At least you and Carlos are both in the same house." Walsh said. "That Cop/Paramedic thing is weird." Holly gave them a look and the men burst out into a fit of laughter. Within five minutes, Grace bounced back down the stairs. The men looked at her. Okay, She did clean up really well. When she had her hair down and his bounced around her face, it made all the men in the house turn their heads.

"Have fun." Holly told her, "But be careful."

"I always am." Grace winked as she walked back down to the outside world. She buttoned up her leather jacket as the winter air slammed into her. Luckily the bar wasn't too far away. Grace stuffed her hands into her pockets to keep warm. Okay the few blocks seemed like miles when it was this chilly. She saw the neon sign up ahead. Her walk burst into a slow trot. She wanted to get there. She fluffed up her hair as she walked up to the bar.

Grace walked in and looked around the bar. Ah, warmth, She thought as she saw Brendan. He was already at the bar…Laughing. There was a gorgeous woman sitting next to him. Grace stood there and watched them for a moment. The lady was obviously flirting.

Grace started to get mad. Okay, maybe the real word was jealous. She watched the woman lean over and kiss Brendan. Now Anger boiled up inside of her veins. Not that stupid L word. She watched Brendan put his hand on the woman's chest and pull away from her. She wanted to scream at him. She watched as he turned around in his seat and looked at her.

"Shit." He said. Grace could read that much. She turned around and left the bar. This was why she didn't like to get herself invested emotionally with someone. All Men were the same. "Grace!" Brendan rushed out of the Bar.

"Don't. don't you even dare." Grace growled.

"I know what you saw and it wasn't what you were thinking." Brendan said. Grace turned around and stared at him.  
"I start falling in love with someone and see where it gets me? A broken heart." She snapped.

"Grace, listen to me." Brendan calmly said, "I was just sitting there waiting for you. This lady came over asking me if I was an off duty cop. I told her where I worked and she started to come onto me. I told her I was seeing someone and she was persistent. She leaned over and kissed me. I pushed her away. That's what you saw. I swear."

"You're all the same, Brendan. Men. All the same." She said. Brendan shook his head.

"I'm not, Grace. I'm different." He said.

"You didn't look much different than every other asshole I know when you were back there." Grace crossed her arms over her chest.

"I know what it looked like and I swear, I didn't want it." Brendan said, "I pushed her away." Grace sighed deeply kicking a rock with her heel.

"I just…I don't like feeling like that." She mumbled. Brendan smirked.

"Feeling like what? Jealous?" He asked. Grace looked at him and smacked his shoulder.

"I don't get jealous." She said. He couldn't help but to laugh.

"That is a load of bull." Brendan said, "You're jealous. You're completely jealous. And don't think I didn't catch what you said before."

"And what was that?" Grace asked.

"you were falling in love with me." Brendan said. Grace pierced her lips.  
"I didn't say that." She turned and started to walk away. Brendan chuckled as he followed her.

"Yes you did, Grace." Brendan said, "Which is good because I'm falling in love with you…hard." Grace stopped walking. "Don't you want me to love you?"

"Brendan…" She whispered.  
"Don't think, Grace. Tell me what your heart wants. Don't over analyze anything." He told her, "That always makes you stressed. Just tell me what is in your heart."

"I don't know what's in my heart." She whispered.

"Yes you do." Brendan walked up behind her. He put his hand on her lower back, "You know exactly what you're feeling." Grace turned and looked at him.  
"I love you okay?" She with a slight growl of anger. "Are you happy now?"

"Yes." Brendan smiled. "I'm very happy." Grace sniffed slightly. She couldn't look at him directly in his eyes. She just couldn't.

"Good." She mumbled. Brendan tucked his finger beneath her chin and tilted her head up.

"I love you, Grace." He said seriously, "I will never do anything to jeopardize that."

"I know one hundred and one ways to kill a man so you better not." She said.

"I won't." Brendan leaned over and kissed her gently. It was scary. She was giving in to what she was feeling. She was setting herself up for heart ache. Love wound up hurting. Most of the time. Carlos and Holly seemed to have something real. Maybe it could be done. Maybe love wouldn't be such a bad thing and it would be something she could live off of.


	3. The Ring

April 4th, 2005

Brendan was on cloud nine. He had every reason to be. Grace was feeling more comfortable being in a relationship with him. She had no problem with holding his hand in public or him wrapping his arm around her shoulders. It was nice to be this happy. Brendan knew it'd just get better.

"Mom?" Brendan walked into the house, shrugging off his jacket.

"In the kitchen." Marion called out. Brendan walked down the familiar hallway and stepped into the kitchen. He smiled as he watched his mother. She pulled out a tray of chocolate chip cookies from the oven, "Hey sweetheart."

"Hey." Brendan walked over and kissed her cheek.

"How is work going?" Marion asked. She hated having her eldest child being a police officer. She saw the stress that Cathel was under.

"You know, like work." Brendan grabbed a cookie and bounced the hot piece in his hand, "Where the kids?"

"School, Brendan." Marion chuckled, "it's one o'clock in the afternoon."

"Oh yeah." He said sitting at the kitchen table.

"Tara got onto the cheerleading squad for next years season." She said going to the fridge to grab the milk. Brendan chuckled as he shook his head.

"I can't picture her being cheery and jumping around." He said.  
"Oh she'll be fine." Marion laughed. She handed her son a glass of milk as she sat down, "So why are you here?"

"I love you too, Ma." Brendan smiled.

"You know what I mean." Marion rolled her eyes. Brendan bit into the cookie as he thought about it.

"Well, how did you know dad was the one?" He asked. Marion's face brightened, but he could still see the sadness behind her eyes.

"I wanted him to be the one the moment I met him but the moment your father said I love you….I knew he was the one." Marion said, "At the mere mention of his name, my stomach would start to tingle. Why?"

"I was just wondering." Brendan said. Marion shook her head.

"No. You were not just wondering." She said to him, "Tell me. Is it about Grace?" Brendan's stomach began to tingle.

"I suppose so." he said.

"I suppose so." Marion mocked her son's voice. Brendan snickered.

"Okay, yes. It's about Grace." He said.

"Have you said I love you yet?" Marion asked. Brendan nodded, "Oh Brend…"

"Oh don't start planning our wedding just yet." He said.

"I'm not." Marion picked up a cookie, "But you seem to have had that idea on your brain."

"I did, but now it's gone." Brendan said. Marion groan.  
"You certainly are your father's son." She said as she got up. Brendan watched her leave the room. Two years ago, he would have taken that as the highest form of compliment, but now…he wasn't sure if he did.

"Can I take some of these cookies home for Grace?" Brendan yelled.

"Stop yelling." Marion said walking back into the kitchen, "Yes you can."

"Thanks." Brendan said as Marion slid a small velvet box towards him. He stared at it, "What is this?"

"That's the ring your father gave me when he proposed." Marion said.

"Mom…" Brendan looked at her.

"Now I'm not saying to propose to her tonight, tomorrow or even next month." Marion said, "But I want you to use this…if that's what you want." Brendan opened up the box. The diamond wasn't huge, but it was perfect. It would look perfect on Grace's finger.

"It's beautiful." He said, "But I'm not ready to propose to Grace yet."

"Well that's fine. But when you are, you have the ring." Marion said, "Now I need to do laundry. Those kids don't know how to do their own crap yet."

"Don't say crap." Brendan smiled looking at the ring. So here it was. This ring WAS perfect. Brendan hoped he would know when the perfect time to propose to her would be.

* * *

Grace walked up the stairs to her apartment. She already knew Brendan was there. His car was out front and she could hear music coming from her apartment. She smiled opening the door.

"Hey." Grace tossed her keys onto the table and walked in.

"Hey." He walked over and gave her a quick kiss. She glanced at the cookies.

"You baked?" She asked. He shook his head.

"No my mom did." Brendan said.

"You went to see your mom?" Grace asked. Brendan nodded. "How is she doing?"

"She's getting along." Brendan said as he watched Grace eat the cookie. "She gave me her engagement ring." Grace looked up at him, her eyes were wide.

"What?" She crocked out. Suddenly her throat felt very very dry.

"The engagement ring my dad used to propose to her with…She gave it to me." Brendan explained, "Would you like to see it?" Grace quickly shook her head.

"No." She said. Brendan chuckled. That was the exact reaction he had expected from Grace.

"I'm not going to propose to you, Grace." He said. She finally exhaled.

"Good because we're not there yet…" Grace put the other half of the cookie down. She thought about it for a moment, "I don't know how much of a good wife I would be."

"You would be a great wife." Brendan said, "You will be a great wife." He watched Grace's cheeks turn pink.

"Brendan…I don't know if I ever want to get married." Grace said.

"Of course you do." Brendan said, "But not for awhile. I don't want to get married for awhile either. I want to live together first."

"Good." She said, "Wait, was this all a set up to make us live together." Brendan chuckled and hung his head.

"You saw through it?" He asked.

"Yeah I did." Grace crossed her arms over her chest, "You want to live with me?"

"Yes." Brendan said, "Would you want to live with me?"

"If you clean up after yourself." Grace seriously said.

"My mother trained me well." Brendan said.

"And if you're the one doing the moving." Grace said, "I like my apartment and I hate moving. I don't want to move ever again."

"Deal." Brendan said, "I don't care where I live as long as it's with you." Grace smiled as she wrapped her arms around Brendan. God, that thought terrified her.


	4. Crazy

1**April 18th, 2005 **

**Grace hated to admit it but it was really nice being in love. She hated it when Holly would go on and on about how much she loved Carlos and all that mushy stuff. But right now…She could feel herself slip up and talk about Brendan.  
"And then you know how he gets." Holly laughed. Grace blinked her eyes and looked at her.  
"What?" Grace asked. Holly smiled.  
"You weren't paying attention to a single word that I was saying were you?" Holly asked. Grace shook her head.  
"I was thinking. Sorry." She said.  
"You weren't thinking. You were fantizing about a certain cop." Holly said. Grace gave her a look.  
"Maybe." Grace sighed deeply, "Okay, look. Don't say anything to anyone but…we're in love."**

**"I knew it!" Holly cried. Grace groaned as she jumped out of the bus. "You were just too happy and that twinkle in your eye."  
"Forget it Holly." Grace mumbled as she ran up the stairs.  
"Forget what?" DK asked.  
"Nothing." Grace said pulling her jacket off.  
"Her and Finney are-" Holly was cut off by Grace's hand over her mouth.  
"Finney and I are seeing each other. No reason for that to go any further." She shrugged. DK looked at the woman as if they were insane.  
"Did you smoke something while you were out there?" He asked them.  
"No. No we did not." Grace let go of Holly and sat down at the table. DK shrugged his shoulders and left the women alone. "Holly, please just keep it quiet."  
"But why? Being in love means yous hould be shouting it from the roof top. You should be screaming it at the top of your lungs." Holly told her.  
"That's…That's just not me…" Grace tucked her hair behind her ears nervously.  
"Make it be you." Holly said, "There is no better feeling in the world that being in love."  
"I'm in love." grace shook her head.  
"That's it." Holly said, "Now hang out the window and shout it at the top of your lungs."  
"God, I couldn't do that." Grace began to laugh.  
"I'll do it after you." Holly said, "I dare you."  
"We're not children, holly. We shouldn't be acting like them." Grace told her. She hated feeling like an idiot and she knew that was what she would feel like if she did what Holly said.  
"Oh but it's fun to every once and awhile." Holly stood up and pulled Grace to her feet, "I'll do it after you." Grace looked at Holly and began to laugh.  
"Oh I must be nuts." She shook her head and walked into the living room. She looked at DK, "Excuse me for a moment. What you see here is not the real me.""Whatever." DK mumbled. Grace opened up the window. She was doing this and she wasn't even drunk. She took a deep breath and hung out the window.  
"you can do it." Holly egged her on.  
"I'M IN LOVE!" grace screamed out the window.  
"I'm in love too!" grace looked down and saw Brendan looking up her. Grace's cheeks flamed bright red. "I hope youre screaming about me."  
"I'm screaming about you." Grace nodded.  
"I'll show you how much I love you tonight." Brendan chuckled.  
"Brendan…." grace glanced at the people walking on the streets.  
"They already think youre crazy so it's okay." Brendan said as the sirens began to shriek behind grace, "I love you, Grace."  
"I love you too." Grace closed the window. Okay, so maybe proclaiming your love wasn't the worse thing to do in the world. A little silly, but not bad. **

**May 1st, 2005**

**Brendan stood in the doorway watching Grace as she slept. She was gorgeous. He was such a lucky man to have a woman like that in his life. He counted his blessings every single day. He knew when he had first met her that she was gorgeous but there was something more beautiful about a woman the day after an amazing night.**

**"Yore staring at me." Grace mumbled. Brendan chuckled as he walked over to the bed.**

**"I can't help it. Yore beautiful." He said.**

**"Bed head is beautiful?" Grace asked. Brendan nodded.**

**"I have something I want to give you." He said. Grace scrubbed her eyes as Brendan walked over to his dresser. "I know we discussed it before, but...I want to do it. I don't think I can wait much longer."**

**"For what?" Grace asked. She looked over and saw Brendan holding a diamond ring. She sat up in bed. She was suddenly wide awake, "Brendan..."**

**"Just listen, grace." Brendan sat on the edge of the bed.**

**"Okay..." Grace whispered.**

**"I love you. I love you more than anything I've ever loved before. I knew from the moment I met you that I wanted you to be my wife. I know how life is short and I don't want this chance to pass me by. I want you as my wife." Brendan said, "Now I'm not saying we need to get married this year...but someday I want to. I know we've discussed this and I know we haven't known each other for very long but neither did Nieto and Levine and they're getting married soon. I love you, Grace. I want you to have my name and my children."**

**"Wow..." grace's heart was racing fast. She never thought of herself as the marrying type, but once she met Brendan she knew she wanted to marry him.**

**"We can have a long engagement if that makes you feel better." Brendan said, "I've discussed this with my mother. This ring was hers. My father gave it to her and it would mean the world to me if you accepted it."**

**"Brendan..." Grace said.**

**"What?" Brendan asked.**

**"Technically you haven't asked me anything yet." She said with a playful smile upon her face. Brendan chuckled nervously.**

**"Grace, will you marry me?" He asked.**

**"Of course I will." She said taking the ring and sliding it onto her finger, "it fits perfectly."**

**"No apprehension?" He asked her. Grace shook her head.**

**"None at all. I've known you were the one for awhile now." grace leaned over and kissed him softly. "You should call your mother."**

**"Now?" Brendan asked.**

**"Yes now." Grace leaned over and grabbed the cordless, "Here."**

**"Thanks." He chuckled. Brendan dialed his mother's number and waited for her to pick up, "Hey, let me speak with Ma...because I said..." Grace chuckled as she listened to his end of the conversation, "Hey, Ma... Fine. Guess what...No, not that. Yore going to have a daughter-in-law soon... yes we are. Thank you. Yore the first...Yore welcome, Ma. Grace sends her love. All right. I need breakfast too. Tell Sissy. I love you too...Bye."**

**"So, is she happy?" Grace asked him.**

**"She's thrilled and wants to discuss wedding plans with you." Brendan chuckled.**

**"Fun...We've been engaged for five minutes and she's already planning it." Grace smiled as she slid out of bed. **

**"She means no harm." Brendan said to her. Grace grabbed a brush off of the dresser and began to brush her hair.**

**"Oh I know." She said looking at him, "I mean it may be nice. Lord knows my mother wont be any help."**

**"Maybe she will be. You should talk to her." Brendan said. Grace shook her head.**

**"I can do this by myself and maybe with your mom and sisters help." She said, "Are you hungry?"**

**"Very." Brendan said to her.**

**"I'll make you some eggs and sausages. How does that sound?" She asked him. Brendan sighed and nodded.**

**"That sounds fine." Brendan stood up watching Grace walk down the hallway, "Are you all right?"**

**"I'm fine." Grace said, "Toast?"**

**"Toast will be fine." Brendan said, "Do you want to talk about this?"**

**"Brendan, there's nothing to talk about. We're engaged and I'm thrilled beyond belief." Grace said to him, "Later we'll discuss wedding date and all that fun stuff but for now lets just enjoy this feeling all right?"**

**"All right." Brendan said as he stood in the doorway. She was still beautiful when she was upset and stressed. She would be beautiful no matter how pissed she got. It was Grace.  
**


End file.
